Obedient Wives Club

I know it’s been a long time since I wrote in here. Our lives have just been so hectic with work and I must say he’s getting a bit lenient with me, but I’m still getting spanked almost daily, just that with lesser number of spanks and with less force. I’m sure things will go back to the way it was like before when we both aren’t so consumed with work.

On another note, I’ve been reading about the Obedient Wives Club. It was set up in Malaysia by a club who also believes in Polygamy (a man can have up to 4 wives). They have been facing a lot of criticism. I feel thats its underserving, mainly because they are free to choose what they want. I think our LDD lifestyle is quite similar to the OWC, mainly because both clubs/societies/lifestyles focuses on being submissive. I think our lifestyle takes it one step further though, as it gives men to responsibility to discipline us when we’re not being submissive.

The OWC founders have been getting numerous phonecalls, visits etc by the international press hoping for an interview as well as from the feminists groups and activists. I wonder – when the LDD lifestyle gets found out by the press, would we be facing the same amount of criticism, if not more?

who is mr loving dd?

On C’s blog (rncblog.blogspot.com), she mentions his book so often and seems that he’s been guiding their LDD relationship through his blog. I tried to access his blog, but all I get is an empty page that says mary ellen (http://www.lovingdd.blogspot.com/)? Is the site restricted? And how can I get hold of his book? Does anyone have any idea?

its been almost two weeks!

we’ve been at this for almost two weeks. the last week has been very trying for both of us. i guess we got by the first week because of the excitement of something new. something like a new diet, a new course etc. and within the next few weeks, we start to procrastinate, but thats human nature i guess.

so as i was saying, the last few days have been extremely trying. and there were so many times i wanted to get out of this ldd lifestyle. i just couldnt help throwing a tantrum, and convince myself that i’m allowed to throw a tantrum. but my HOH has been quite patient with me and not given up on this. he says, he has tasted being the dominant one and he loves it. yesterday, was the worse day ever. when i dont get out of the house, my mood becomes horrible. I tried so hard to gain hs attention but he’s busy so doesnt humour me. And i become fustrated with the lack of attention and start throwing a tantrum. and then he says he cant cuddle with me when i’m throwing a tantrum, so i become even more enraged, get punished. and in the end i got spanked 5 times in a day. (about 20 times with the wooden spoon each time). i think he’s going easy on me because we’re both under a lot of pressure because of uni.

Did anyone else feel this way when they were starting out? Or am I just terribly naughty?

anyway, we tried out the wooden spoon. i must say, it hurts a lot when i’m actually getting spanked, but like 5 mins later, it doesnt hurt at all, unlike the cane, where i’m feeling it for a few hours.

Today has been a good day, i haven’t gotten any spanking although i threw a mini fit on the way to uni. but when he came back, he seemed to have forgotten about it. maybe i’m just making it out to be bigger than it is.

When i came home from gym, i saw a couple of packages – one for me and one for him. i bought a family guy dvd from amazon. and was very curious what he bought but controlled my urge to open it. anyway, he did open it in the end, and he bought a loopy johnny. Maybe seeing how nasty it looks made me really good today.

This is the most similar picture i could find on google. It’s a leather one, instead of rope, which is the one C has (rncblog.blogspot.com). Scary right? Anyone out there got spanked with the loopy johhny? Share your experiences with me!

(I’m going to post a separate topic on smthg else, dont want to mix up the two topics!)

a nice lunch out ruined by me misbehaving

This is proving to be very difficult!

We went out for a nice lunch today after uni, and then walked around town to run some errands. He decided to walk one way cause he thought it would be faster. I suggested walking a different way or driving so we would be quicker. And he said that there wouldn’t be parking so we should just walk, and anyway, we had a heavy meal so it would be good to walk to off. I mentioned it again a while later but he said that he already took my suggestion into consideration and I should just drop it.

While walking, I noticed a parking lot near HMV (one of the shops we wanted to visit) and said we should have driven and parked there. He said, that’s the third time I’ve brought it up and I’m going to get it when I get home. Meanwhile, we dropped by Wilkinsons to pick up a wooden spoon, a suggestion from C’s blog (rncblog.blogspot.com) about quieter implements.

On the way home, I tried to get around it, saying it was a constructive suggestion, but to no avail!

When we got home, as we were walking up the stairs, he said you know what to do, and he pointed to a different corner of our house, in the corridor, between his room and my room, and said, stand here.

I was very relunctant about it and unwillingly took off my clothes and stood in the corner, facing a door. From that corner, I could see what he was doing on his computer was quite distracted by it and wasn’t really reflecting. After a while, he came to punish me and I apologised and asked for my punishment. 30 times with the wooden spoon. I thought it wouldnt hurt as much because it looks so small. But it hurts! The impact is harder although the surface area is smaller!

I was a bit unhappy with this while thing, and after a while I started throwing a tantrum again, kicking about, not talking to him. And after two warnings, I got yet another spanking! I refused to do corner time, and squated there instead. Finally pulled myself into the corner and was made to stand there for what felt like ages! Lay across the bed for another 30 spankings with the wooden spoon and 12 more for moving, using my hand to cover and being disobedient initally. my poor butt!

my 1st maintenance spanking

Today I had my first maintenance spanking, 30 paddles with a few mins of corner time (i’m not really sure what i should be reflecting on here). EC thinks that maintenance spankings should be spontaneous and not pre-arranged like how most other LDD couples do it. It should be a form of upkeep when I’m slipping behind and not being submissive enough. But remember how I was talking about being submissive yesterday? Today, even after my maintenance spanking, I don’t feel as submissive as yesterday.

my emotions through the day

I think when people talk about maintenance spanking everyday (when couples start LDD) i used to think it was a bit extreme but i think now i understand the benefits behind it. In the morning, I wake up, and I kinda forget yesterday’s spanking, and sometimes start breaking the rules. After getting a spanking (albeit punishment / disobedience spanking not maintenance), I become slightly sorry for myself and my butt. But after about an hour or so, I become more submissive, loving and feel more demure. Its like there is this new calmness within me.

I think the LDD lifestyle is tough, it’s a lot of self-control, watching what I say and do, but I’m starting to see the merits to it. I was just telling EC that I feel that I used to have this emotional barrier between, very independent and knowing I can just walk away from this relationship without any feeling. But now, I feel that this barrier is slowly breaking down and I feel more connected to him.

While feeling calm and demure after a spanking, I can see things I used to say/do which weren’t nice but EC would just overlook and never say anything up to a point that I just did all these nasty things unconsciously.

We’ve been intimate the past three days, having it slowly and passionately rather than it being hard and fast. It’s a nice change and like I said, I feel more connected to him and it just feels so pure and natural. We still have our kinky side, blindfolds, etc. and it’s always nice to mix things up a little.

EC, I hope you won’t give up on me and keep teaching me, guiding me and loving me. I know these few days I’ve been trying to manipulate my way out of LDD but I think it’s because I’m not used to your new authoritative nature.

throwing a tantrum

I had another spanking this morning (see punishment diary). anyway, he went off to the gym, and i know i really shouldn’t have done this, but i saw his computer switched on, and i could see something on Internet explorer and saw that he was reading the rncblog. I saw a MSN window open and was very curious as he was talking to one of his friends whom i really detest and read through their conversation. I feel very bad about it now, and i’m now extremely scared for saturday when EC reads through my journal.

i’m a bit upset cause i was so determined to be good today, and i got my spanking today at only 11am!

being less demanding

EC mentioned today that he was feeling horny and wanted sex but not at that moment and maybe at some point later. so i’m just waiting for him to call me. i’m not used to waiting for him, i kinda want sex now, but i’m not going to go over and demand it of him like i usually do.

trying very hard!

another spanking

i said i would try very hard not to read his email but i did it! yikes. i wasn’t very apologetic and started throwing a tantrum cause i used to be able to access it whenever i want. but anyway, i got a spanking, 50 times with the paddle. and i’m still very sore from yesterday. ouch!

but anyway EC said he feels quite turned on be this, but he thinks its because of all the masculine energy he is forced to bring out whenever he spanks / punishes me.

can’t give a long post on what i’m feeling, i’ve got a lot of work to do. 😦

trying so hard to be good

Today, I really felt tempted to go through his emails again. Its such a bad habit and I know what to expect if I do it but I’m so curious to see whats new there. I’m trying hard not to do it. This morning I went to the gym for a quick workout. And in the gym, this guy was looking at me, and it felt like he was looking at me for quite a while. I like to think that I’m polite and generally quite friendly and so I smiled at him. And now i feel quite guilty about it, but I’m not sure if i broke any rule, as it only says that I can’t look at another guys when I am with him. this is probably the most submissive thing I’ve ever said in my life but I’m not going to tell him, but if he reads it and deems it appropriate to punish me, then i’ll just accept it as something I should not do and should learn.

i don’t know how long i can keep up with this, i have this feeling which i don’t know how to describe. its like a mix between fear, guilt and being weak. we spoke about it a bit last night, i think i’m not used to him being so authoritative and telling me no, which is possibly the first time he’s said it to me.

my butt is sore, and thats the only thing holding me back from checking his email. i even have hotmail up on a different tab. yikes.